DeliEli

Well, thinking is a burden, I have to take, but sometimes I just wanna shut down my head, cut off my ears and stick down my eyes. Feelings are overflowing and I'm starting to do hoping for more self-consciousness, more friendship, more love in my life... I care about the reproaching they do, the bullying... It's not about being unconscious, but about being different. I never wanted to have fans like most of the others do. I am not interested in superficial relationships, that go on for days or weeks. I don't understand people who are friendly and happy all day, every day, every hour, every minute. They think I might be mad. I just hope for

I'm sitting in the school library and thinking of what to do now. Maths lesson is cancelled, my friends are absent, even not existing. On my mobile a photo of an old friend. I miss her and think of funny times we had. Yesterday I went through her facebook pics and found some cute ones. When she coloured her hair, had a day with her cousin, got new glasses, even on Halloween. Once I saw the pictures, I had a kind of nostalgic feeling, like going through a development I never really realized. Suddenly I'm thinking of what I have now. I got a home, I got a family, I got electronic stuff. But no real friend. Nobody to talk to, to tell my proble